


Don't start now

by DanielaZeballos1991



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Harry Styles, Fluff and Smut, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Top Liam Payne, Top Zayn Malik
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25008394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanielaZeballos1991/pseuds/DanielaZeballos1991
Summary: Zayn and Harry's love relationship has reached a point that can no longer be the same. Love has ended for one of them. Zayn decides to finish everything once and for all, leaving a broken Harry without knowing what to do with his life. Is there life after Zayn? Harry thinks there is not.
Relationships: Liam Payne/Harry Styles, Zayn Malik/Harry Styles
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> My first Zarry fic 🙂
> 
> Please be gentle, english is not my first language. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Chapter One

Harry's POV

\- Sorry, Haz, I can't do this anymore - Zayn, my boyfriend for three years, said to me, while looking at his hands as if they were the most interesting thing he had ever seen, he looked up and I saw his eyes fill with sadness but they also showed determination about everything he said - I'm going to move out, this is over.

I felt like I couldn't breathe, my eyes clouded with tears. I watched him as he got up from the couch where he was sitting, in our apartment, where we had been living together for just over a year.

Zayn went straight to the room, ending our conversation. And even though it seemed like I couldn't even get up because of how bad I was feeling, I chased after him with tears falling down my cheeks.

"Zee, don't go, please don't go," I pleaded as I tried to hug him, but he just pulled me away without giving me a glance. - I'm going to change, I promise, I'm gonna be better, for you, for us - I said to him while crying, in the middle of the room, seeing how he put all of his clothes in his suitcases.

\- No Harry, I already made up my mind - he said as he grabbed everything that fit in his hands. - I'm tired Haz, exhausted, everything went to hell. Everything is a fucking routine, and it seems like you enjoy being stuck, stuck all day in this damn place.

\- W-what are you talking about Zee? We go out to college every day ... Y-you said as long as we're together, everything would be fine. You said ..

\- I know what I said Haz - he cut me off abruptly, raising his voice a little. - I was a young silly boy when I said that Harry, I really believed that "love could do it all" - he emphasized with his hands when he said that last part, as if he was making fun, with a cynical smile on his face. - But it's not like that, love ends and you have to get on with your life. - He finished closing the suitcases and putting his shoes on, he got up and gave me the coldest look I ever saw in his eyes.

\- You suffocate me Harry, forgive me for saying so, but being with you is like being dead, we are not old Harry, and you never want to do nothing, you never want to go out, EVER. You get sick every time I want to do something different or when I want to go out with my friends. I'm bored, I tried everything to make you change or to feel better. I tried to understand you, I know you are shy, I know you like to stay at home, but I can't take it anymore, I feel dead here living with you. God! I am only 21, this can't be everything there is for me in life. I want a normal life, I am young Haz, and so are you! - He approached me and put his hands on my shoulders, I looked at him with my eyes clouded with so many tears - And yes... You do need to change, but not for me, do it for yourself... Please don't cry anymore, I assure you I don't deserve your tears.

That was the last thing he said to me that night, he grabbed his bags and left.

I cried for three days in a row, I didn't want to go out, I didn't want to eat, I couldn't even move to get out of bed. My head kept hurting and I thought of a thousand ways to end my life. It felt like without Zayn, the love of my life, it was not worth going on, there was no point in going on with life. 

What hurt me the most was that I didn't notice anything, I thought everything was fine. I really believed that we were so in love that nothing could end all the love we had for each other.

Now that I spent these last days just with my thoughts, I realized that he was right. Everything was gone to shit.

The last few months, we barely shared a few kisses. I remembered, so far away, the last time we made love, and it only happened because Zayn got home drunk. I couldn't even call it "making love" that time. It was rogh and quick, no kisses or tender words, Zayn was only looking for relief because he was more than horny. Finishing up inside me, he simply rolled over and fell asleep until the afternoon of the next day.

That day, like almost everytime, we ended up fighting, I didn't like at all when Zayn went out, least of all when he got that drunk. But I didn't like going out with him either, not because I didn't really want to, it was because I feel extremely insecure of myself, although everyone who get to know me told me how attractive I was, I just couldn't see that in the mirror. I always found so many imperfections that sometimes I hate to see my reflection, so I tried to avoid it as much as I could. Even Zayn, countless times, had done everything to improve my self-esteem, but it seemed that nothing helped, at the end he simply gave up.

And dating someone like Zayn didn't help much either. I mean, Zayn was, without a doubt, the most handsome boy I've ever seen. Otherworldly beauty was the only suitable way I could find to describe him. I don't even know how a boy like Zayn, had noticed someone as myself, it was something I don't understand at all.

So I did not want to go out at all if it was not necessary, I had convinced myself that if we stayed at home I would not have to worry that someone else wanted to steal him away from me.

After all, when you are in love, you don't need anything else, right?

How wrong I was.

Thoughts??


	2. Chapter two

Flashback

Zayn met Harry when he was seventeen, he was starting his last year of school, this year all the schools in the area had organized a soccer championship and the games were played in turns in the different schools. That is why Zayn, along with all his classmates, was at Saint Peter School, sitting on the benches waiting for the first game of the season to begin.

Zayn did not belong to the official team, but he could replace a player if necessary. But for now, he was just there as a spectator, sitting next to his best friend from high school, Aaron. They were talking about everything and nothing, while Zayn looked around to see if there was something interesting to catch his attention. Or someone. 

Zayn had always been a little flirty and arrogant, just a little. He knew for a fact that he was one of the most handsome and most popular boys at his school, so he liked to socialize and meet new people. He liked to go out to parties and dates, nothing serious of course, after all he was only seventeen, he was still too young to think of having something serious. He was openly bisexual, and he had already dated many girls and some boys, just having fun. And being in a new place, full of new faces, he felt like a kid in a candy store looking for the sweetest treat to jump into.

And boy did he find it.

There he was, not far from the soccer field, he did not look at all interested in what was happening and he was chatting happily with another boy. When he saw him, Zayn thought he had never seen a prettier boy. His hair was curly, tucked into a cute little fringe that he fixed every now and then with his delicate hands. He was tall and thin, and although he wore pants that were a bit baggy and saggy, you could tell he had long, thick legs and a nice bum. What caught his attention the most though, was his smile. His beautiful, full dimples on display, bright smile.

\- Hey Z, are you even listening? - Zayn focused again on his best friend who seemed to be saying something to him but he had not heard anything

\- umm, what were you saying? - He asked confused

\- Forget it, what are you watching anyway? - Aaron asked rolling his eyes and looking towards where Zayn had his gaze - Ahhh I know - he continued with a smirk - you already found your new target, right? - He chuckled - You never waste your time Zee, who is the lucky one?

\- See the curly-haired boy? The one who is talking to the short guy? - Zayn pointed at two cute guys talking with smiles on their faces

\- Uhm yup, good eye Zee, he looks cute - replied his friend looking at the curly boy from head to toe. Making Zayn frown, he didn't like, at all, how his best friend was checking out the beautiful boy with curly hair.

\- hey! I saw him first - Zayn said nudging him.

\- Relax Z, I'm just looking, you have good taste, sometimes - he said mockingly, turning his eyes to where the boys were he realized the other boy, the shorter one was kinda cute - he has a nice friend too - he concluded with interest.

\- Yeah, we should go say hi - Zayn said standing up and walking towards the boys, with Aaron on his heels.

Being closer to the curly boy, he couldn't help but notice he was really beautiful, he had the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen, big, round and the rarest and most beautiful shade of green you could imagine. His unblemished skin looked so soft he just wanted to reach out and caress his cheek. And those lips, ufff .. his lips, looked so plump and soft, with a shade of pink he could only describe as sexy, he imagined himself, for a microsecond, biting and licking those sinful lips.

\- Hi! - Zayn said with a huge smile, when he was next to the boy with green eyes

The boy looked at him for the first time, and his eyes widened in surprise, he looked down quickly, blushing furiously. He didn't seem to remember how to speak, which Zayn thought was extremely cute.

\- Hello, are you coming with the seniors? - Asked the other boy, Zayn looked at him, he was a little smaller with blue saucy eyes.

\- Yes, hi, I'm Zayn and this is Aaron, nice to meet you - Zayn explained, to look back with interest at the curly boy, who looked away again, his cheeks with a deep red shade.

\- I'm Louis - said the shortest one with a huge smile - and this is Harry, my best friend, he's a bit shy - he said giving him a gentle nudge as a joke

\- Harreh - Zayn thought - pretty name - 

\- Louu ... - said Harry, who finally spoke, still a little flushed - hello - he said with a shy smile, looking directly into Zayn's hazel eyes.

For a few seconds, their gazes held together, both feeling an immediate attraction, like an electric shock that ran through their bodies, it was 'love at first sight', they would both say later.

Zayn had no hard time at getting Harry's phone number after that. They started talking almost every day by text messages, then followed the endless calls that lasted until dawn. Zayn felt that he could talk to Harry about everything, he loved how Harry was somewhat childish and he always had these cute funny stories about himself. Zayn enjoyed a lot all the time he was spending with Harry, even if it was just trough the phone. 

A month after their first meeting, after countless calls and text messages, Zayn took courage and asked Harry out on a date, and for the first time in his life he felt nervous. Harry was so different from every one he had ever met. He was so innocent, so sweet and kind, sometimes he behaved like a little kid, he was funny, and above all he was absolutely beautiful, but it seemed like Harry did not know that fact, whenever he talked about himself, he used to get all nervous making comments that showed his lacked of self-esteem. At the moment, Zayn just decided to ignore that little detail, all he wanted was to see Harry again and he really wanted to know if they could have more than just a friendship.

So when Zayn finally asked Harry if he wanted to go on a date with him, he felt very unsure and scared, he was afraid that Harry's answer was going to be negative, he was so shy and it seemed like he rather be running away from any kind of social interaction. He was very relieved when Harry agreed to go out with him. He felt like he was in the clouds, floating with happiness. Nothing could erase his smile trough all the days before their date.

Their first date was perfect.

Zayn didn't like to exaggerate, but yes, it was perfect. Harry was more beautiful than ever, and he was smiling all the time. They went to the cinema, had ice cream and then when it was getting dark they went for a walk in the park. Zayn took his hand as they walked, Harry didn't push him away and he interwined his fingers as he gave him a shy smile while blushing again. He was just too cute. 

At that moment, with that smile, Zayn realized he was in love.

Zayn knew it was too soon, to feel something like that for someone he had only met a little over a month ago, but he couldn't explain it any other way, he was in love. He had never felt anything like this before in his life for another person and it felt really good. And although he was very scared, he decided to launch himself with everything to this new and beautiful feeling in his heart. He said nothing at the time, he just squeezed Harry's delicate hand tightly. He pulled him into a deep hug kissing him on the forehead.

At the end of the day, it didn't matter he had fallen in love so soon. It felt so good, nothing could go wrong.

Or could it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of background :)
> 
> They started so cute right?
> 
> Hope u Enjoy. 
> 
> Xoxo


End file.
